Why Do I Cry?
by Reach4thestars19
Summary: Hermione's thoughts after the argument with Ron when they are leaving the Yule Ball. She finds herself in tears and tries to understand all the changes that have occured.


**Why Do I Cry?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters, they belong to JK Rowling.**

**AN: This is my first Harry Potter story though hopefully not my last. This story takes place right after the Yule Ball and it is from Hermione's point of view.**

"You ruin everything!" I shouted at him, walking up another step of the staircase. Tears were burning behind my eyes, but I did not wipe them away. If I did then he would know how much his words affected me.

I heard the two of them retreat and then sank onto the stairs. I couldn't stop the tears from falling, nor stop the sobs that seemed to escape from my throat. I tried to hold them back, but I couldn't. Realizing I was unsuccessful, I just let the tears fall.

Why couldn't Ron just let me be happy? He used me as a last resort and then decided to be rude to me just because I was with Viktor. Until that night at the ball, Viktor was the only boy who has given me a second glance. Why wouldn't I go with him? He is handsome, which I have to say is not a bad quality. He is also brave, smart and very talented. He could have any girl, yet he chose me.

So why was I sitting there crying? My dress, the most beautiful I have ever owned, and my hair, often untamable, curled just right. I even put one just a light amount of make up for this night. I had such high hopes for the night and it was wonderful. That is, until Viktor left and I ran into Harry and Ron.

Harry seemed happy enough for me, but Ron was horrid. He called Viktor the enemy even though Viktor used to be his hero. What changed in just a few months? It could not be because Viktor is competing against Harry because he shows no aggression to Fleur or Cedric.

Once Ginny admitted she thought Ron fancied me. I had to fight hard not to laugh at that. Ron and I started on the wrong foot and if not for the fact that he and Harry rescued me from the ogre, we probably would never have spoken unless we had to. I do not regret their friendship. In fact, I welcome it. My parents love me, but they can not understand the magical world I am in. That is why I enjoy spending time with my friends as well as the entire Weasley family. Mrs. Weasley is almost like a second mother to me and Ginny is like the sister I never had.

And then there is Ron. He confuses me so much. We are friends, yet he seems to enjoy irritating me. He seems to know just what things to say to bother me, and I think one of the sayings about red heads is true. He does have a bit of temper. If not for Harry, I do think that our fights could have gotten worse.

So why has an argument, much like numerous others we have had, caused me so much pain now? I do not often cry, yet it happened, and in public nonetheless! It should not affect me so much, but it has, and I am at a loss of what to do. I thought things would stay the same, that we would always be friends, the three of us. While I know things would change, I did not think our friendship would, but it has. And the feelings I have for Ron are much different, and much more confusing than I have for Harry.

Oh if only there was a magic spell to fix such hurts, or a charm that would help me understand others. I am sure there are such things, but I have yet to find it. Also, I would not want to taint friendships with magic. I just wish Ron would tell me what is going on! He has been acting strange for quite some time and much more difficult.

Just then, there was a sound from down the hall and I knew more people were coming. I couldn't let them see me crying like this. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, and then lifted my dress slightly so I would not trip on it as I got to my feet.

I brushed off the front of the dress, then glanced around, seeing only a few other girls. There were two of them looked as upset as I felt. I hoped I did not look like that when I had been crying, nor that any of them would think I was crying over something foolish like not having a fine time at the dance. I did.

I lifted my head slightly and walked briskly toward my room. I was going to enjoy the memories of the night and worry about Ron later. After all, tomorrow is a whole new day and there would be enough time to worry then. However, until then, I was going to allow myself to be happy.

With that thought in mind, I wiped away the last trace of tears. Why do I cry? I still do not know. I will find out those answers tomorrow though, after a night that is sure to be full of wonderful dreams.


End file.
